I recall hearing "sticks and stones can break your bones, but words will never hurt you." Other popular sayings are: “watch what you say,” and “the pen is mightier than the sword.” My life may have been a little easier if, I had just understood the wisdom of these sayings in my youth.

Ask any writer, poet, lawyer, teacher, politician, salesperson, and minister, how carefully they assess the words they use.  How often has someone blurted out words, where others felt offended?  One word can send a person into a downward spiral, especially if they are working in the “public eye.”  A person can say hundreds of words, and make one mistake using one word with an outcome that can change their life.

One biblical reference is the "Tower of Babel,” where language was segregated.  Instead of having one language, there would be many.  Words would mean different things to different people.  The key word here is "separation." A word can be spelled differently, while meaning the same thing, and meanings can be different for the same word.  We have different languages, and meanings that can be so complicated, that we need dictionaries, glossaries, and editorials from consultants telling us the meaning of the words we just heard.  Many speeches have a host of experts to tell us what was meant.  Heaven forbid we would interpret the meaning for ourselves without coaching.

Some words are very powerful.  They can inspire, educate, express beauty, define, seduce, manipulate, hurt, condemn, and kill a person’s self-esteem.  Words can be used to validate who we are, express what we want, talk to God in prayer, shares tidings of love, spread warnings, tells lies, and used as a weapon to hurt.

Words have such power over us.  It is amazing that our mouth and throat can have such an influence on us.  “You are beautiful,” “I hate you,” You are so smart,” “You are worthless.” Have you ever noticed how the words describing a person is flattering, only to turn to judgment and disdain later?   Popularity on this planet can be fickle.

I have a friend, whose son’s teacher told him that he was unlovable!  How can that happen?   How many times have people been told they are powerless, and there is nothing that they can do to change a situation?  My twin brother and I were adopted.  When it came time for my parents to tell us the news, what they said was: “Your real parents didn’t want you.”  Now, my adoptive parents were great people.  It was just the way it came out of their mouths.  It is so easy to say what we do not mean.  I hear stories all the time at work, where words have sculpted a person’s self-esteem, and followed them for a very long time.  We listen to people say words, and buy into their perception of our truth.  Words paint a mirror of how others feel and think about us.  Words tell us what we should or should not be.  Words define our actions as good or bad, right or wrong.  Words set down the rules.  Words also express the beauty in this world.  Words help us understand and learn.  Without words, I would not be able to communicate through this column.  The effectiveness of words depends on how they are said, and where they come from.

When the ego uses words, watch out.  Eventually it will lead to words causing a problem.  We have become so caught-up with the importance of words, that we have abandoned feelings.  Words that are connected to the ego will have a different result, and often not pleasant.  Words driven by the ego build illusions, concepts, and lies.  They are used to separate, and to confuse us.  Words that connect to feeling come from the “heart.”

When we come from the heart first, we will say what we want to say.  The mind will catch up.  The heart/mind can be so full of joy and happiness, that finite words cannot express it.  The heart/mind, will express accurately the words that have meaning.  There is a knowing and understanding that replaces the ego’s version of fear, hurt, misunderstanding, and separation.  I am sure we have all heard speakers that have come from the ego.  They spew out words, and we get bored, or we accept them without asking questions.  Ego does not want us to ask questions.  Speakers, who come from the heart, touch us in a deeper way.  We feel and understand from our experience, what they mean.  The heart does not age.  The word from the Spirit and heart are ageless, and can be understood in all age groups through all time.  With words of truth, there is no debate.  Words of ego will always have duality, and perception.  In truth, there is only one side.  Words of the heart, coming from the Higher Power, is where the Real power lies.

We have "frequently used" words backwards.  Most people go from Words to Thought to Feeling. There is a duality of love/hate, good/bad, right/wrong, and like/dislike.  Words are sometimes said without thinking, and lack sensitivity towards others.  Words can slap!  If you slap someone first, then try to communicate…it probably will not be affective.

The Spirit and heart go, from Feeling to Thought to Spoken Words. Heart is singular with experience, knowing, and feeling.  It is spoken, and understood without two opposite sides.  A word that is felt, transcends the mind, has the understanding that goes beyond language.

I would like to live in a world when one language is spoken from the heart, no matter what words are used.  A Golden Age, where there are words of unity, and understanding, without towers of separation.  Truth replaces lies in a world of understanding, and knowing.  Conscious awareness, not ego, empowers words.  How lucky to have such an incredible experience that it leaves us speechless!

This world of language of the heart is just an understanding, and a decision away.  It is available now, and lies inside each of us.  Emotion and feeling empowers a thought that can lead us to expressing words of wisdom and love.  Words coming from the mind without heart will be limited.  The brain alone will never understand the truth, but lead by the heart, will transform into an incredible experience.

Hopefully, these words came from this heart, and wish you a wonderful week of saying what you mean, and meaning what you say.

You can reach Nancy Barr at: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.